Bereavement support
Organising a funeral using a funeral
director
Questions people ask about burial / cremation
Exhumation
Arranging the funeral yourself
Arranging a secular service
Choosing a gravestone
Music selection
Before arranging a funeral it is important to check if the
deceased left any instructions with the Will regarding their
wishes. It may be that they wanted to donate their body for medical
research or donate their organs for transplantation. Funeral
arrangements may have already been made using a pre-payment plan,
or specific instructions may have been left concerning the funeral
ceremony itself. If there is a Will, the executor has the right to
decide whether it should be a burial or cremation (even if the Will
expresses a particular wish). If there is no Will, the next of kin
should decide.
By law, a death must be registered. This is usually done in the
county or borough in which death occurred, although it is possible
to register the death in another area by arrangement.
In order to register a death, the registry office will require
the following:
- Certificate of Cause of Death
- Full name of the deceased (if a married female, the maiden name
and her husband's full name will also be required)
- Home address of the deceased
- Date and place of death
- Occupation of the deceased
When the death occurs at home
The nearest relative and family doctor should be informed. The
doctor will complete a certificate stating the cause of death. If
cremation is desired, two doctors are required to sign a
certificate. The first doctor will instruct the second doctor, who
can see the body in the mortuary or chapel of rest. The doctor's
certificate must be taken to the
Registrar in the registration sub-district where the death
occurred, normally within five days (see above).
When the death occurs in hospital
A certificate will be issued as above, but the hospital may wish
to carry out a post mortem examination of the deceased. Before this
occurs, consent must be obtained from the nearest relative.
When the death occurs suddenly
If the death was sudden, and the doctor had not seen the patient
within 14 days of death, the
Coroner must be informed. The coroner will decide if it is
necessary to carry out a post mortem examination. If it is decided
that death occurred from natural cause, the coroner will issue
notification to the effect that an inquest is not required.
Alternatively, the coroner may decide that an inquest should take
place in order to establish the cause of death.
Using a funeral
director
Most people choose to employ a funeral director to make the
funeral arrangements on their behalf. If you are unsure which
funeral director to choose, you can contact the
National
Association of Funeral Directors (tel
0121 711 1343) or the
Society of Allied and Independent Funeral
Directors (tel 01279 726777) who will
be able to provide you with details of their members. When you have
decided which funeral director you wish to use, contact them as
soon as possible. You will need to provide them with information
about the deceased such as their full name, age, occupation and
religion. You will also need to tell the funeral director if a
minister is required for the ceremony.
Burial
If a grave has already been purchased, you will need to provide
the deeds or some other documentation to show proof of ownership.
If a new grave is required, you should decide in which cemetery you
wish the interment to take place and who will have the exclusive
right of burial named on the deed. At the City of London Cemetery
you may view the different types of grave available. The funeral
director can arrange an appointment for you, and a member of staff
will show you all the options.
The funeral director will ensure that all relevant documentation
is delivered to the burial authority in good time (the City of
London Cemetery requires this by 12.00 noon, two working days prior
to the interment).
Cremation
You will need to advise the doctor that a cremation is desired,
so that two doctor's signatures may be obtained. In addition to the
Death Certificate, a Statutory Declaration is required for
cremation. The funeral director will give you the relevant forms
which must be completed by the Executor, the nearest surviving
relative and witnessed by any householder to whom the applicant is
known. As with burial, the funeral director will ensure that the
necessary documentation is delivered to the cremation authority in
good time (the City of London Crematorium requires this by 10.00am
one full working day prior to the cremation).
Arranging the funeral
yourself
There is no legal requirement to use the services of a funeral
director to make the arrangements on your behalf. If the death
occurred at home, the deceased's doctor and nearest relative should
be contacted as soon as possible. Once the doctor has certified the
cause of death, the body may be washed and dressed. If the death
occurred in hospital the family will need to collect the body from
the mortuary. A coffin can be made or purchased from a funeral
director, and a large estate car or similar vehicle may be used for
transportation of the deceased.
Arrangements for the ceremony can usually be
made direct with the cemetery or crematorium. If a religious
ceremony is required on the day of the funeral, the cemetery or
crematorium usually has a list of ministers you may contact. If you
do not wish to have a religious ceremony, see
below.
Your rights under our
charter for the bereaved concerning arranging a funeral
without a funeral director are as follows:
- It is your right to organise a funeral without the use of a
funeral director.
- It is your right, as executor (or next of kin) to be given the
body by a mortuary, hospital, etc, in order to carry out a funeral
without a funeral director.
- It is your right to obtain a coffin (minimum bio-degradable
type) via your charter member.
- It is your right to obtain a personalised or Independent
funeral leaflet from your charter member describing how to arrange
a funeral without a funeral director.
Useful publications
What to do after death - DSS leaflet D49 free from the Benefits
Agency (find your local office) or from the Post
Office.
Survey of funeral costs - free from the
Order of
Odd Fellows (tel 0161 832 9361).
Probate - Dealing with someone's Estate - factsheet 14 from
Age
Concern (tel 0808 808 6060).
The New Natural Death Handbook - from the
Natural
Death Centre's range of publications.
Arranging a secular
service
Many people choose a religious ceremony following their cultural
traditions, but there is an alternative. It is possible to appoint
a Humanist officiant or even to conduct the ceremony yourself. You
can contact the British Humanist Association (tel 020 7430
0908) or the National Secular Society (tel 020 7404
3126) for help and advice.
If you have decided to arrange the ceremony yourself, you will
need to consider what you wish to say, and what music, if any, is
required. The service itself may be made up of anecdotes, poems or
readings from a favourite book. A moment of silence can be
incorporated for those present to remember their loved ones and for
any religious people to pray. Remember also that when talking about
the life of the deceased, to use both their full name, and other
name(s) by which they may have been known to others.
In the case of cremation, where the ceremony is to take place in
the crematorium chapel, you will need to decide in advance if the
coffin is to be carried into the chapel ahead of the mourners or
after everyone has been seated. You may also choose whether or not
the curtains around the coffin close or remain open prior to the
committal. However you decide the ceremony should be conducted, you
can ask the funeral director and/or the crematorium staff for
advice beforehand.
In the case of a burial, you may wish to hold the ceremony at
home, in a civic building or at our non-conformist chapel. At the
graveside, it is best to keep the committal reasonably brief for
the comfort of the mourners.
Useful publications
Funerals without God - a practical guide to non-religious
funeral ceremonies available from the
British
Humanist Association.
The New Natural Death Handbook from the
Natural
Death Centre's range of publications.
Music selection
Music selection guidelines (15kb)
List of music available (153kb)
Bereavement
Local bereavement groups and contacts are listed below.